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And never will I give up trying... [entries|friends|calendar]
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[Monday,
August 20th, 2007]
why are people so mean to me when I did nothing to them?

Im sick of it.

spread rumors about things I didnt do -- tell them how I did two boys at the same time and while youre at it tell me how everyone hates me and how they choke you for even have ever talked to me and make fun of me when I leave.

ditch me one more time and make me sit at home crying to Taylor Swift.

say things that dont mean anything to you that I thought were true.

tell me that I took advantage of our friendship when I was the one who didnt that it was you, and then when I try to talk to you or I apologize (even though it wasnt my fault) keep on ignoring me

I wanna go to school far far away where I wont have to associate with anyone but my parents wont let me :o(
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[Thursday,
June 7th, 2007]
it just hasnt been my day everyday for 6 months.

Im just waiting to actually be happy again.

things were starting to. and then they stopped.

and now its just misery all over again.

I also have no friends anymore. which is wonderful. :o(
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[Wednesday,
May 9th, 2007]
I need my best friends and my friends right now more than anything. and I dont have any of them anymore. and I fucking miss them like hell and wish they didnt leave me.
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[Saturday,
April 14th, 2007]
I know I hardly write in this much anymore except for when I need to vent, and those are friends only entries... but I love these and its about time I do it again!

Comment anonymously - and tell me: a story, a secret, a love, a fear, a hope, something youve always wanted to tell me, anything!

I wont be updating again (both Friends Only and public entries haha so there :o) now you have to comment!)

until I get 20 not including my own so comment away!
Ill turn off the IP adresses on this entry, so theres no knowing who wrote what
so I think everyone should do it now since I cant tell who its from :o)</center>

thanks kiddos, ♥ Lauren
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[Tuesday,
October 10th, 2006]
Does anyone know anything about transferring to Suffolk, Emerson, Emmanuel, maybe Northeastern or Bridgewater. I want to transfer.


I fell in love with Brown and RISD :o( blah. I want the city. or any other Boston schools that are good schools let me know thanks
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[Tuesday,
September 19th, 2006]
I need a song for a paper for my writing class. a song that either describes me, my life, or my values etc. any suggestions?!
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[Sunday,
September 3rd, 2006]
This weekend has been a lot better :o)

I switched to a single in Stonewall after my parents pulled some strings, its a lot quieter here A LOT!

I mean its the weekend and noones bothered me noise wise at all, *knock on wood* but like I only have to sleep with my fan on low to lull me to sleep :o)

I mean I know its only been 2 nights but its so much nicer, I sleep a lot better & last night Meghan slept in here cuz her roomies bf has been in there room since Thursday and it was nice I got a matress in here! my little single can actually fit two people so if any of my ffriends come visit then can sleep on the extra matress cuz nobody on the floor knows what to do with it!

The only annoying thing is is that I want the 65$ back from the microfridge in my old room in which all I ever put in it was a slimfast and milk - I mean come on I left the room and youre getting another roomie for you two, and I paid 65$ which covers me for the whole year! and I left before even a week boo :o( also my roomies act weird when they see me and put up weird away messages now that Im going but whatever Im a lot happier

my parents are taking me out to Newport for dinner and Im excited, I love them a lot for dealing with me and being so nice to come down here so much to make sure Im okay and theyre bringing me Meghan and Marissa to CVS to print our pictures out! cuz I need to decorate my wall because it has a lot of scratches and putty from idiots who decided gray would cover up holes and match the green but whatev :o)

I have to go talk to my boy who has my <3 hes dealt with so many rough issues with me this week and I owe him the world
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[Wednesday,
August 23rd, 2006]
anyone with a mac who knows how to make aim normal and not lame. it changes my profile font and signs me off randomly.
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[Wednesday,
June 28th, 2006]
Anybody who likes birds? I dont know what kind. theyre smallish. wings clipped. ones blue and white the others green and yellow. a cage with bells, a water thing, a food thing, a ferris wheel, a removable tray to clean their mess, a big thing of shavings and food. and well drop them off at your house! PLEASE SOMEONE TAKE THEM we have a dog and dont have a place for them. WHO DOESNT WANT FREE BIRDS?!
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[Sunday,
January 22nd, 2006]
[ mood | tired ]

Im awful and I absolutely ♥ these. And from my little friends only entries lately, its definitely a change! So here we go

Comment anonymously - and tell me: a story, a secret, a love, a fear, a hope, something youve always wanted to tell me, anything!

I wont be updating again (both Friends Only and public entries haha so there :o) now you have to comment!)

until I get 20 not including my own so comment away!
Ill turn off the IP adresses on this entry, so theres no knowing who wrote what
so I think everyone should do it now since I cant tell who its from :o)


Okay thanks <33

♥always
Lauren
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[Friday,
January 13th, 2006]
HI IM GOING TO COLLEGE!

I got into my number one, Roger Williams. So there is no longer a need to apply to Saint Anslem and UNH because well IM GOING TO ROGER WILLIAMS :o) Its absolutely gorgeous, and has one of the top psych programs, and Im in love with it. so you know, Im wicked friggen excited right now :o) :o)
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[Friday,
December 2nd, 2005]
Everything you said to me last night pretty much meant nothing. and thats all I have to say.


The rest of you can think this is about whoever you want, just please dont flip out on me like some of you have.






On a lovelier note. would anyone like to hang out tonight?
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[Thursday,
December 1st, 2005]
I have this horrible habit of spilling my guts to people when they think I hate them. because I cant stand hate, and I dont hate anyone, and I dont want them to hate me. so I say things I probably shouldnt. and I lose it, I give in, Im weak. and thats what gets me. thats what gets me like this I think.

I have to learn to stand up for myself. and things. normally Ill say what I think. then I just give in, and I cant keep doing that, it has to be strong all the way. because Ill only truly lose if I give in, and Im losing a lot more than just an arguement.




This makes no sense Im dumb Im stupid I quit but I gave in at the same time|



Im going to bed
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[Sunday,
November 6th, 2005]
I feel like I dont know any of you, anyone anymore.



and I really dont like it
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[Sunday,
November 6th, 2005]
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[Thursday,
October 20th, 2005]
[ mood | worried ]

So a couple people wanted to know why I wont be updating again. so I just thought Id write an entry sharing why.

number one, Im finding it harder and harder to relate to everyone these days. I do not have problems, I dont know what youve been through, I cant help you, and youre not willing to even just talk about it.

number two. Im trying not to care anymore. My problems are tiny and unimportant, and I need to cut back on complaining. I make too many mistakes, maybe I blame things too much on other people. Maybe things really are always my fault. Maybe I just need to think about things on my own, without complaining, and figure them out. Maybe I just need to become a better person. And Im going to try really hard to work at it. I miss my old self, I hate how much things affect me, how down I get, I miss the way I used to be

and that pretty much sums its all up


I just need to slow down, catch my breathe, make things normal, work on bettering myself, and maybe when I can do that successfully, Ill come back, until then Ill continue to read everyone elses and maybe comment im me anytime or myspace it up :o)

With love,
Lauren

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[Sunday,
October 16th, 2005]
[ mood | cold ]

Im probably never going to update this again.

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[Sunday,
October 2nd, 2005]
[ mood | depressed ]

I always always always do these. and I havent since before the summer so here we go again

Comment anonymously - and tell me: a story, a secret, a love, a fear, a hope, anything!

I wont be updating again (both Friends Only and public entries haha so there :o) now you have to comment!)
until I get 20 not including my own so comment away! Ill turn off the IP adresses on this entry, so theres no knowing
who wrote what so I think everyone should do it now since I cant tell who its from :o)


<3 Lauren Marie Dubyaaa

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[Sunday,
August 14th, 2005]
If you can guess what today is Ill give you a dollar :o)
































Just kidding but its my birthday! Happy birthday to Amanda toooo anywherewithy0u :o)


I wont give you a dollar but you can give me comments ;o)
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I hope you get the chance to live like you were dying [Thursday,
June 2nd, 2005]
[ mood | blah ]

I think I <3 these way too much, or I dont heart studying nearly as much so here we go again for the 90th time haha

Comment anonymously - and tell me: a story, a secret, a love, a fear, a hope, anything!

I wont be updating again (both Friends Only and public entries haha so there :o) now you have to comment!)
until I get 20 not including my own
so comment away! Ill turn off the IP adresses on this entry, so theres no knowing
who wrote what so I think everyone should do it now since I cant tell who its from :o)


<3 Lauren

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